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The Hedonist Wears Louboutins

Done right, BDSM is a gateway for self-discovery and haute exhibitionism.

As the test gets longer, it also gets deeper and darker, and I kind of wish I made a mental briefing with my subconscious to prepare for this. From wanting to know if you like to be “verbally degraded or called humiliating names,” to asking whether “sexual torture turns you on,”—I’m definitely no square, but this was intense. When my results come out, I am not so surprised: 100% Switch (someone who likes being both top and bottom), and 99% Vanilla (someone who is not into BDSM). I am also a little bit disappointed in myself… that was anticlimactic. Interestingly enough, though, the test does reveal that I am 99% non-monogamist (into open relationships), 76% Experimentalist (wants to try it all), and 47% Ageplayer (daddy/daughter or mommy/ baby role play, not necessarily incestuous in nature)...still, Marquis de Sade is not impressed. I understand now why BDSM is a form of self-discovery: I don’t actually really know what I like and what I don’t like—I’ve never tried them...the burning question was: am I willing to find out?

Originally published in Esquire magazine, August 2017.

Read the full story online at Esquire Philippines.

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